Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
