Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Randomize