Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Randomize
