I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize