Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Randomize
