Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Randomize
