do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
he thought i was a dude.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
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