Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
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