Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize
