Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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