i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
