what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
