OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
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