Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
I could have mohawked her pubes.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Randomize
