No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
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The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
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I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
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