4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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