Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
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