she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
Randomize
