The maid of honor just puked.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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