we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Randomize
