Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
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