went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
