Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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