yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize
