Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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