i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Randomize
