i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
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