p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
