i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
