He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Randomize
