Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
