dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
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