end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
and i looked up. we had an audience...
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
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