Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
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