you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Randomize
