Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Randomize
