Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
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