i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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