Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
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