I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Randomize