shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
So. Much. Porn.
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