I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
no. you can't hotbox the world.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
