I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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