how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Randomize
