Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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