omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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