shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Randomize
