party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Randomize
