I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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