i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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