Swine flu is the new snow day.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
I'm both gender and math confused
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
